I decided the mood on this blog needs a bit of a lift. We probably all need a lift seeming as it is the beginning of the week, it’s March, and if you live by me there is new snow everywhere. So today, I am here to tell you about a time I did something really stupid one “February-Marchish” time of the year many years ago.
The year was 2000. My life was pretty consumed with important things like Destiny’s Child, V.C Andrews books and trips to Maurices in the big city with a population of 4000 nearby. It was also at this pivotal and mature time in my life that someone had decided to grant me with a driver's license. I was free and I was headed to Subway to meet some friends about 20 miles away. It seemed like a wise way to spend the forty dollar paycheck I had earned from beeping groceries and stocking shelves at Ernie's Market for the last two weeks. Big day.
A small detail you need to know for background information on this story: Where I grew up we had a single stall garage, so the car was outside all of the time. It was always plugged in to keep the battery alive during the winter.
So I hopped in the car and off I went. I was turning left onto the main highway and on the corner of the street was a gas station. My brother's friend Michael came running out of the gas station waving at me. I waved back. He kept waving..both arms this time. I waved back more enthusiastically and added a smile. I probably thought I looked really good that day with my butterfly clips and hair twists.
I was about halfway to my Veggie Delite Sub, when I looked in my rearview mirror and noticed the man driving the truck behind me was waving to me too! I waved back.
I was happily walking INTO the door of Subway when I noticed all the people in the restaurant looking at me, then out the window, then back at me. Laughing. Laughing AT me. I did not smile back. I seriously was still so clueless at this time, until I looked out the window.
Friends, there across the Subway parking lot lay a fifty foot bright orange extension cord still plugged into my car. Let me tell you. There is no embarrassment like the embarrassment of wrapping up fifty feet of frayed up wire while a group of people watch you from inside Subway. I imagine it was at about this time when the tiny light bulb that flickered dully inside of my head in those days went off signaling that those people from earlier were not “WAVING” hello at me. In my head I scolded myself and had a conversation that sounded like this:
"You are SUCH a STUPID IDIOT. NOBODY was waving at you. YOU ARE NOT COOL. And NOW YOU do not get a sandwich. But I am so hungry for bread with veggies! No. everyone in there is laughing at you. Leave NOW."
I threw the cord into the backseat of the car. And I left. I did not eat a sandwich that day. I used the money to go to Pamida and bought a new extension cord for my dad because I knew I was going to be in trouble if I didn't. And winter is dumb and that is my story. Have a happy week!
Labels: Stories to Laugh at
