The other night over dinner a few of my girlfriends and I visited about how we are becoming overwhelmed with the social media in our lives. It was actually proclaimed by one of the women in the group, "should we be the "hippies" of our generation and delete ALL social media accounts?" which was a great idea that was quickly squashed when we realized half of the women present needed social media for their businesses.
Enter in part 1 of the "de-clutter the social media in your lives" challenge. The purpose of this challenge will be to clean up your accounts so that the time you do spend staring at a screen could be uplifting, encouraging and perhaps even productive. But first, you will need to learn how to say "no" to the solicitors.
We are currently living in a time where women are flourishing with the selling of their own shares in a variety of businesses. Skin care, hair care, clothing, make-up, nails, supplements.....etc. Some of my closest friends sell these products and I am open to trying new things and have even hosted parties for some of them. I don't deny that there are some great products out there, and women with great intentions and wonderful hearts. I have personally decided to JOIN the groups of women whose products I am interested in. Yet, you know how some people hang "no soliciting" signs on their doors? I am starting to think some of us need a "no soliciting" banner across our Instagram and Facebook accounts. Let me clarify, a "no soliciting unless I ADD your business page myself" banner. We are in need of some serious boundaries here. Case in point, here is the problem I seem to be having;
Almost everyday, I have a new Instagram request or Facebook friend request from different women I have never met. You might have a different category of stalkers, but it seems the women in really fancy work out gear taking bathroom selfies of their six packs that are out to "get me" and change my life. It's like they just see my profile picture and say to themselves, "Yeap. There's a tired weakling who hasn't worked out in two years and eats frosting out of a jar from time to time. Wait until she see's the forty pictures of my ab's I shared last week, she will so want to buy my product". This actually happened yesterday. Here is how my online conversation went down (to be fair, she caught me on a bad day and I am sure she is a lovely person):
Beach Body Solicitor I have never met: Hi! I am pretty sure we have never met, but from your profile I see we have friends in common so I thought I would say hi! I am always looking for fun new friends on here to learn from, hope that's okay I requested you!
Me after doing a quick scroll of her account: Hi! We do really have wonderful mutual friends. However you have come into my life at a time where I have decided to delete all beach body related coaches from my social media accounts after about the 20th Facebook request. For me personally, seeing the before and after's of women in their bra's makes me feel like crap and does nothing to inspire me. I currently need to work on growing in other areas of my life. I do believe that my health is very important and plays a huge role in being a good mom and wife, (I wish I would of said here, but so is my MENTAL health) and I wish you the best in helping others who are open to it.
You know the saying for Facebook that goes, "before you make a post, consider if you would say it to a room full of people." Well, if you have never met someone, would you really approach them and ask if they want to lose weight but first be motivated by seeing a bunch of pictures of you in your bra? Doesn't that sound ridiculous? Because it is! Or how about, "oh hey! We haven't talked in twelve years, but your family is adorable? How ARE you? Can I tell you about this product and share my story on how it has changed my life....." Nope. Stop. And don't even try to tell me that pictures of half naked women is empowering and motivational. Nope. Am I shaming these girls? No. But I feel like they are trying to shame themselves with their "before" pictures. Have you seen some girls who post pictures where they already look fantastic in their "before" picture? How is that supposed to help seriously overweight struggling people? I want to shake them and say, you might have a syndrome called, "hey everyone tell me how good I look" syndrome. Posting pictures of your body constantly for others to give you a "like" is the opposite of having a healthy mindset which completely contradicts the positive lifestyle these people are trying to sell. My mom set a wonderful example of working out almost everyday when I was growing up. Besides walking our dog for miles and miles, playing with us in the backyard she also did some mean Denise Austin Videos. But I remember her wearing a big baggy old T-shirt and sweat pants while doing so. Where the heck did everyone's clothes go since 1989? But I am veering from my point here.
It could be something different for you. One of my good friends had THREE private messages about joining a skin care group before she had to firmly say NO. Listen up women. Most of us are too nice and feel bad declining a request, but it's okay to say NO THANK YOU. If you sell a product, don't go privately harassing others to join your group or buy your product. They will COME to you if they are interested! Start your own facebook page and blog, and live your best life. Tell people how good you FEEL. How much you are LEARNING. People who want what you have, will seek you out!
To add to this, you should not be spending thousands of dollars on yourself each month in regards to your skin, health, hair, nails, clothes...whatever it is! And your social media can make you start to believe that is the "norm" and you should spend more. I'm here to tell you it's not the norm and you don't need to spend MORE.
If most of your Facebook and Instagram has become consumed with products you should buy, or pictures of how fabulous other women are presenting themselves in the mirror, it's time to start deleting. Especially the women constantly posting pictures of their toned whatever that day. It does nothing for our mental health as women, and women, we are MORE than just the products we buy and the shape of our stomachs. Happy deleting and stay tuned for part two.Labels: Thoughts on Life
